I THOUGHT MY PARENTS HATE ME

As a small boy growing up in the village, where I virtually lack most of my needs, because my parents were poor. I still remembered my primary school days, where I used to walk barefooted to school. My other colleagues, whose parents were well to do, used to enjoy all the things that I couldn’t. My main source of lunch in school was what the school provides us (wheat). Hence my parents couldn’t provide me some of my needs like, new uniform at the beginning of an academic year, two coin in old Ghana Cedi for my chop money, new exercise books, sandals, pack bag, you name it, then I concluded they hated me. Every morning after my mother have bathed me and smear me with our local shear butter called “kpangaari” she will heat the leftover food “Tuozaafi” for me if the most fortunate happened last night, and see me off the road to school. As for my father good not to talk about it, because as early as 5A.M he has already left for the farm. So on my way to school every day, thoughts like my parents hate, my parents are wicked, I wished I didn’t have parents, when I grow up and get my own money I will not also give them anything just like most thoughts. At school I used to have a friend whose parents were well to do, and anytime the father passes by the school with his SUZUKI motor bike, he always give me two coin, so I always ask myself why can’t my parents give me that. Then I started giving calling my friend’s dad my father, because I thought he was more of a parent than mine. This is because he was able to give a lot of things to his son. However, even though my parents couldn’t provide me with my needs but they always make sure I was discipline, respectful and all the good things you can think of.

The introduction above is an open chapter for my write up. I will use it to analyze the content of my message in the article. Do the material things you give me justify your love for me? How can I know whether you love me or not? Do people hurt those they love? And these are questions that might or not answered in this write up, my parents were not providing me my needs, simple because they couldn’t afford it, so if we should judge people love by what they give us, we may be misjudging. My parents used to love very much, but they couldn’t get me what I needed, my friend was not a good boy in the school as teachers and students know, he was a thief, disrespectful and arrogant but his parents used to provide him his needs, because that was their responsibility. The father used to provide him those needs not because of love, but for the sake of abandoning his responsibilities or the criticisms that might come from the society. Likewise, my parents loved me, but they couldn’t also perform their responsibilities. Again the question as to how you know whether somebody loves you or not, is one of the most difficult questions people has been asking me, to me, it will depend on one’s definition of love, what I believe is that, we can only know of our love for others but for others love for us I think is difficult to know.

The final question as to whether people sometimes hurts those they love, and my answer to this question is definitely yes, because sometimes you have to hurt some people you love in order to help them achieve what is necessary for them. Some people hurt the one they love unintentionally, while others do so intentionally. Love, which is such a noble attitude, often involve feelings and behaviors towards each other. We mostly find out that our parents are sometimes being too aggressive towards us than strangers. This is because they will tend to be hurt if we don’t achieve what is necessary for us. My friend’s father used not to care about his son’s immoral acts; I still remember my parents never spared me with any wrong act done. From this I concluded with my little knowledge and wisdom that my friend father love him more than how parents loved me because he used to his son material things. Today my friend’s life story is not something to talk about and I can proudly attribute it to the paradoxically love his parents showed him. So if we are to judge others love for us based on what they do to us or what they give to us with their intentions, we might probably be wrong. Parents actually discipline their wards not because of hatred, but for the act of love. We as people sometimes have to do things that might temporal hurt our loved ones in order to give them a permanent peace….

Suntaa Ibrahim

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